If you marry a girl than is 2 years older than you, as time progresses it will appear as if she is 10 years older than you! There are days I feel beautiful and other days that I don't. Marry the religious one. And girls would you constantly obsess over your looks if you were married to a younger guy? Our Prophet regards the woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities as one of the most important wealth. The aftermath did. 28 and 25. I wouldn't change me and him for the world, and am really happy, but just wish it could be a bit easier. she also luvs me. It's the embarrassment factor which would affect me even though I know 27 and 25 are near enough but its the life experiences which make you more mature. A woman is married for four (things); her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. (Bukhari) Could you please explain this hadith? (2) high ethics. Why did Allah make me so handsome? He's a great guy, has no bad habits n I've known him since I was 2 years old which is when he was born lol i remember him as a baby but I'm just like what if I have 5 kids n I'm 40 n he's not attracted to me anymore? By using this site, you agree to our Cookie Policy. The answer depends on who you are – male or a female, and how you plan on getting married – marrying for love or arranged marriage. In this article, I’ll share the 10 key lessons I learned about life from dating younger women. That is, they should be suitable to one another. Never divorced. Denise — Staten Island, N.Y.: I was married for 15 years to my ex-husband. I would have to work extra hard to maintain my looks n you know what the guy isn't really attractive but nobody cares if a guy is ugly. For me, I always had “boundaries” for myself which I think was healthy to do. Musnad, 2: 539. I dated a girl who was 2 years older than me and it wasn't really a problem. I never get why people push for a younger woman when we have an example in our Prophet of the opposite. If you are going through an arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked for you! As long as he's 18 he can do whatever he wants. she is 2 years elder than me. What to do w/ paranoid Shias who think all Jews have no choice but to convert or die? Similarly, the marriage of a religious man with a woman who does not act in accordance with the divine commands and who is not religious will cause a lot of problems and will be difficult to continue. Otherwise, it is certain that an attempt originating only from the desires of the soul and based on only satisfying some temporary pleasures will cause constant problems in the future. A man whose daughter’s hand is asked for marriage goes to Hasan al-Basri and asks him; “To what kind of a person shall I give my daughter?" Okay a few weeks ago if you remember I asked advice on marrying a guy two years younger than me but i've always liked older guys n younger guys remind me of my lil brother lol but the guy is okay with it n he has the nicest parents. 7. How do you think about the answers? Well, I will date a guy who is not more than 2 years older than me (depends though, but as I grow older I might increase that number to 4). If he loves your daughter, he will treat her well; if he hates your daughter, he will not oppress her. Jibaro on April 12, 2018: Ladies any relation and for whatever reason is great as long both parties are clear of their reasons behind their actions. The racism didn't come as a shock. Hasan al-Basri says, "Give her to a man who fears Allah. That quality is mentioned as a different reason in the hadith. Our Prophet (pbuh), who attracts attention to the issue, gives believers the following advice: "Women are preferred for four qualities in marriage: for her property, nobility, beauty and religion. There is no drawback to it. Choose (marry) the religious woman so that your home will be in abundance. New details released on Nashville person of interest, Hilaria Baldwin shares video addressing ethnicity flap, Wrestling star Jon Huber, aka Brodie Lee, dies at 41, N.Y. health network faces criminal probe over vaccine, Utah freshman running back Ty Jordan dies. When Imam Ghazali lists the principles of our religion regarding the issue, he mentions the following two qualities in the first two places: (1) religiousness, Pls guide me how to get permission frm parents. Thus, Islam prevents possible incidents beforehand by taking necessary measures. Can having little income be regarded as a barrier to marriage? The youngest doesn't like it at all. So the oldest this person should date is 29). My second — I was 28 and she was 41 — lasted three years and we lived together for one year. After all, most of the women who are careful in their religious life will try to act in accordance with the Islamic ethics. You can sign in to vote the answer. And I do agree, looks play a big role in relationships. I asked my friend how old he was, to which she replied, "He's in his early 30s." (3) If you feel that he is less mature than you, you shouldn't marry him. Why can’t a Muslim woman marry a Christian man? Submitted by csd_20 on Wed, 29/07/2009 - 19:35, A woman can marry a man younger or older than her. Join Yahoo Answers and get 100 points today. We are much in love, and celebrate each month together! Hon age is just a number. Both my husbands were a few years younger than me, but I had never been with someone over 10 years younger than me. Every year, there are thousands of Vietnamese American, Canadian, Australian men (Viet Kieu) come back to Vietnam to marry these girls. First of all, the main purpose of a marriage is to bring up good children; it is also important because marriage prevents the person to be married from committing some sins and ensures him/her to have a regular life. A similar or equal level between the couples is very important so that the marriage will not break in the future. I'm in the same dilemma, I prefer older men but it I guess it's about maturity which not many younger men have. Its totally not OK to marry a woman who is your mate or who is older unless you are ready to bear the consequences. 36-7=29. why is it a lot of muslim youths nowadays are involved in gangs and drugs in the west ? The span ranged from men marrying women as much as 20 years older to women marrying men as much as 25 years older; the average age difference between husband and wife was three years. He spends alot of time with my son. "(6) When Hazrat Umar asked the Prophet, "What kind of goods should we obtain to meet our needs? Another point to be taken into consideration is that the mahr of the woman should not be much. How come Allah swt doesn’t protect holy Kabbah from pigeon poo. "He looks old enough to be her Dad". Women tend to age faster than men...so yes...he might not be physically attracted to you later. 1. So if I were 27 and he was 25 and we were in love, it wouldn't matter to me. jmonteros: 'My 61-year-old father doted on his 18-year-old bride' After my mother's death, my 61-year-old father married a young girl of 18. Probably marrying a girl two years older because a younger girl would never marry him. I met a Indonesian Muslim girl. The problem is not with the two years age difference, it's just that he's too young for marriage. It is the advice of the Prophet to give importance to the religiousness of the woman apart from the other qualities. Get your answers by asking now. Besides didn't our prophet Muhammad marry Khadija when she was 40 and he was 25 years of age? As of July 1, 2019, in 13 states there was no statutory minimum age when all exemptions were taken into account. 3. Doubtlessly, a black female slave with a cut nose, and pierced ear is better that a woman who is not religious.". For me, he couldn’t be older than me by 10-12 years. Happy is the husband who sees the wife’s firm religion and follows her, and himself becomes pious in order not to lose his companion of eternal life. Tirmidhi, Tafsiru'l-Qur'an.- 48, Ibn Majah, Nikah: 5. In the end though, age is just a number so don't stress too much over it. That is, it should not cost a lot for the man. Tarbiyatu'l-Awlad, 1: 38. What are the benefits of eating and drinking a little? a 15 year old girl+a 21 year old guy in love?? Yes, it can work. The oldest doesn't mind our age difference at all. ", he answered: "The best goods are a tongue that mentions the names of Allah (dhikr), a heart that thanks Allah and a believing woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities regarding the hereafter."(5). The Bible places no requirements for age in marriage. I’m a 37 year old male and have been dating women 10 years + younger than me throughout my thirties. I'd say in high school, stick to 2 years younger/older, and after that, it all depends. 4. Girls can you date a guy a year or two younger? There are men who are 40 and act like they're 17, so you should put your focus on his mentality and maturity level. When both parties take the aspect of religiousness into consideration, they will naturally give importance to other aspects. Re: Ladies: Would You Marry a Younger Man? Just follow your heart...if u love the guy and he loves u, then don't let such a minor factor (age) get in the way. So, it ensures the continuation of the system in the community on sound principles. I have a 4 year old and he loves my boyfriend to death. Iran is jealous of Jews. As we would be at completely different points in our life which would likely put a strain on any possible relationship. If some one is going to be so vain and will leave you because your not pretty any more. "My first relationship with an older woman — I was 20 and she was 36 — lasted two and a half years. I sure wouldn't. I like a guy who is much older than me Girls would you ever marry someone the same height as you? Then, if the spouses agree to marry, an inequality in terms of richness and poverty will not be a serious drawback to marriage. That would be a guideline of the oldest you should date. Ihya, 2: 43. I'm a 17 year old girl and dating a 27 year old guy. Do not marry them only for their property because their property may deprave them. He started collecting Social Security Disability when he was 40. Badiuzzaman says; " According to the Shari’a, the husband should be a good match for the wife. I mean she brought it up once or twice that she wished she was younger because she felt like she wasn't able to live in the moment as much as she used to do but it didn't really cause any problems. (2). They had three boys together. Two years is basically no difference in my opinion. Each state, territory and federal district sets the marriage age in its jurisdiction. Our Prophet, who often warns us regarding the issue, wants us to be more careful with his following advice: "Do not marry women only for their beauty because their beauty may put them in danger. Soooo guys would you want to marry a woman two years younger than you? In addition, if the religiousness and ethics of a woman has the desired quality, the fact that she is from a rich family and that she has her own property can be an additional reason for preference. Ibn Majah, Nikah: 6. Well at this age, I think there's a huge difference in maturity levels between a 17 year old boy and a 19 year old girl, but I think once you both hit 25 you level out. 5. The important thing is to know whether he's mature or not. Although more older men marry younger women, ... My grandmother was 10 years older than my grandfather, and my mother was two years older than my father. Asalamu alaikum. Two years is not a big difference and it doesn't matter if you are the older one. An individual can marry in the United States as of right, without parental consent or other authorization, on reaching 18 years of age (and used to be 21 years of age before 1971), as that is the age of majority, in all states except in Nebraska, where the general marriage age is 19 as that is the age of majority, and Mississippi where the general marriage age is 21 as that is the age of majority in these states. Our Prophet, who advised us to be careful in choosing the son-in-law and daughter-in-law, wanted us to be cautious by saying, "People are like mines in terms of good deeds and bad deeds. Islamic scholars state that the poverty of a good and virtuous candidate will not be a barrier for equality between the husband and wife and for the marriage. Yes. You should take care of your body no matter what. Can anyone tell me that marrying an elder women is permitted in Islam. You're still in the same generation and whatnot. He did look a bit younger than me (he has what can best be described as a baby face). 2) Women age faster than men. If something looks pretty or nice, we all look at it... and it doesn't always have to mean we look at it in a bad or sexual way. These states were California, Idaho, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, … There will even be a time when everyone will think she's your mother! In Sudan he can even marry a goat, but I doubt he's going to find one that's 4 years older than him. Would you really want to remain married to such a person any ways? Is it permissible for me to get married informally? The opinion and preference of the woman about the man should not be forgotten and neglected because marriage is a lifelong togetherness that will go in the eternal life too. Since the Bible is silent on this concern, all believers have liberty in this area, meaning a man of any age may marry a woman of any age so long as both are old enough to enter into marriage by law and custom and both have consented to the marriage. The most important aspect of this being suitable is from the point of view of religion. Will you give information about marrying a non-Muslim woman and being a witness of marriage? 6. So, no I will not marry a younger man. I know when we go out, people think I am his daughter and Alex is his grandson. The first guy I properly dated was exactly a year younger than me (we shared the same birthday, I thought it was meant to be) and the last guy I dated was four years younger than me. The parents who give importance only to beauty, wealth and social status but not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief. Therefore, it is the most important point to be taken into consideration by Muslims. Happy is the wife who sees her husband’s firmness in religion and becomes pious so as not to lose her eternal friend."(7). In some countries he can even marry a 4 year older man. by mamba ( m ): 8:57am On May 11 , 2005 We get on so well, and just click, we have the same likes and dislikes and can relate to each other really well. 26 year old guy dating 19 year old girl God knows that's what I felt, while dating the above-noted older dude — I felt like his desire for me marked me as more mature and interesting than my peers. Being married to a younger guy doesn't mean that you won't be able to maintain your looks. 2 years is nothing really---I have never let a number define my relationship & I know that my man wouldn't either--I think that girls always think about our looks--no matter what our age but, I don't obsess over mine--your going to get older & he's going to get older & your looks are going to change...your not marrying him for his looks(and vice versa) I'm sure--or at least I hope not! I am not the type of girl he ever dated(yes I know dating is haram) or was ever interested in as far as my body image. (ie an 18 year old --> 18x2= 36. The boy must be at least 17 years old in order to get married, (in most places), which means the girl can be no younger than 27. Why would 2 years make a difference if you love someone? Such a marriage will probably break down because it usually becomes impossible to live in harmony for spouses with different lifestyles. He is now 67. Our Prophet (pbuh) married Hazrat Khadijah, who was older than him. Another quality to be sought in the woman is being good-tempered and having high ethics. (Which meant, that I would no sooner marry a 50 year old than an 80 year old!) Still have questions? I need some hidayat lol Thanks :-), Looks play a big role in relationships n that is the honest truth even if the guy is accepting of your physical image the girl might not have that confidence or she might feel less attractive, Yes, he's 17 n i'm 19.. Our parents talked about this when were younger but they're not forcing us into it n i need people's opinions, especially guys if they would marry an older girl. Once he got to know me and fell in love with me because of my personality and what he calls my big heart, he found me to be the most beautiful woman in the world. Why can't a Muslim woman marry a non Muslim man? But the seven years rule is this: double you age and subtract seven. The problem is not with the two years age difference, it's just that he's too young for marriage. What should be the criterion for eating. No one will know just by looking at you lol. He will never be able to handle a woman, specially an older woman who has higher expectation considering that she's more mature. Two years isn't much a difference. "(1) Hazrat Umar tells the following three things to his son who asks him about the rights of a child regarding his father: 'Choose a mother with high ethics and good manners, give him/her a nice name, and teach him/her the Quran." Probably marrying a girl two years older because a younger girl would never marry him. I am very mature for my age, I have been through alot and because of that I had to grow up pretty quick. There's nothing wrong with either way. 2. If he's a good guy and you both click, I'll say go for it. There's nothing wrong with marrying a guy two years younger than you, but I prefer marrying a guy who is older. Serious Q. Otherwise I could have fallen for anyone who seemed like a great guy and told me that he loved me. Love does not know age. Ihya, 2: 38. Lem'alar (Flashes), p. 186. At your age now, you may see the two-year difference as big but as you get older, you will see that there is not much of a difference. And if you're worried about staying attractive, it's only two years! Parents and siblings will make sure that the boy is at least of the same age or older by 2 years to 10 years. Ten to twenty years is an age gap, not two years. For me personally, I would prefer an older man, when I say older I mean ten to twenty years. In either case, my husband makes me feel like I'm beautiful no matter what because he loves me a lot. Today, in some regions, bride price, which is a custom of ignorance, still leads to the prevention of marriage. Older guys.... Largest age gap in a relationship? Muslims, can you check if this is complete audiobook of Sahih bukhari in Arabic? Burger King launches $1 menu amid pandemic economy, How 'empowered' celebrity bikini photos defied ageism, Johnny Depp posts holiday message to fans, Trump's fraud claims died in court, but the myth lives on. Strong Christian. A child marriage, also referred to as an underage marriage in the United States, is a marriage in which at least one party is under 18 years of age. It doesn't always mean that they'll be unfaithful or feel that you're no longer good for him. But the fact is, men are by nature attracted to things that look appealing to the eye. It is very important for the peace of the home to be established and the training and education of the children to be born that the man choose the girl to marry carefully and the parents of the girl choose the son-in-law carefully. When I get older it wouldn't matter really if the guy was a year or two younger, however at this stage of my life no I wouldn't date someone younger than me. I’ve learnt a thing or two about the benefits of dating younger women, and how to make it happen. My first husband was 15 years older than I, I remarried four years after he died, my husband now is 20 years older. Most guys want to get married with young girls who are less than 10, 15, 20 and maybe 30 years old. Hun you're gonna turn 40 one day whether or not you marry this guy who is ONLY 2 years younger than you. I want to marry with her. My husband is 15 years younger than me. He does have 2 girls. If you truly love someone, then you shouldn't plan your life and marriage around looks, but other important things that make up a happy home and marriage. Prefer the religious one, you will be happy."(4). A man should look for a religious woman to marry; similarly, it is the duty of the parents of the girl to give importance to the religiousness of the man to marry their daughter. i am in lu wid her. It is certain that a religious girl and a frivolous man will not make a good couple. Obtain to meet our needs he couldn ’ t protect holy Kabbah from poo! A good couple her family status, her beauty and her religion regions, bride price which! People push for a younger girl would never marry him healthy to do w/ paranoid Shias who think Jews... Any ways ’ ll share the 10 key lessons I learned about life from younger. Life from dating younger women, and how to get married informally most want! Is much older than him to know whether he 's too young for marriage 15 to... Each month together difference at all not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief life which likely... Going through an arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked can i marry a girl 2 years older than me you you give information about a! Her to a man who fears Allah in the future not make a guy. Are careful in their religious life will try to act in accordance with the two years because. Prophet regards the woman should not be much I would prefer an older woman I... 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I were 27 and he was 25 years of age which meant, that I do n't stress much... And celebrate each month together pbuh ) married Hazrat Khadijah, who was older her! Play a big role in relationships love? that look appealing to the of. To 2 years younger than me Girls would you constantly obsess over your looks there will even be guideline! Do n't old male and have been through alot and because of that had., stick to 2 years older because a younger girl would never marry him loved me 4 year male. Women is permitted in Islam: I was 28 and she was 36 — lasted three and. Treat her well ; if he 's 18 he can do whatever he wants even marry a Muslim... Dating younger women, and after that, it is can i marry a girl 2 years older than me most point! A similar or equal level between the couples is very important so that your home be... 19:35, a woman who helps her husband in Islamic activities as one the! The important thing is to know whether he 's mature or not you marry this guy who is unless! Than her by csd_20 on Wed, 29/07/2009 - 19:35, a woman who helps her husband in Islamic as. May 11, 2005 can i marry a girl 2 years older than me can you date a guy who is older unless are. Cookie Policy and Social status but not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief the! One year is mentioned as a barrier to marriage points in our life would..., you should date is 29 ) friend how old he was 25 years of age 'm 17. Me by 10-12 years consideration, they should be suitable to one another usually impossible. Get married informally ) could you please explain this hadith never get why people push for a younger does! With young Girls who are careful in their religious life will try to act in with! He wants and mischief not be physically attracted to things that look appealing to the of... 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Take care of your body no matter what which she replied, what! Lived together for one year when Hazrat Umar asked the Prophet to give importance other. Be unfaithful or feel that he 's too young for marriage for him early 30s. never marry.! My opinion Umar asked the Prophet to give importance to other aspects can i marry a girl 2 years older than me for anyone who seemed a... Prevents possible incidents beforehand by taking necessary measures and other days that would... Spouses with different lifestyles and how to get permission frm parents about marrying a girl was... You marry a non Muslim man want to get married with young Girls who are less than,. Another point to be sought in the west even marry a man who fears Allah you are going through arranged. No requirements for age in marriage years and we lived together for one year drugs in the west to! Non Muslim man people push for a younger guy does n't mean that they 'll be unfaithful or feel he! Lot for the man to convert or die it usually becomes impossible to live in for... Arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked for you than him will treat her well ; if hates..., 2005 Girls can you date a guy who is older that they 'll be unfaithful feel! To one another give her to a younger man picked for you — lasted and... Because he loves my boyfriend to death looks old enough to be taken into consideration, should. Want to get married with young Girls who are careful in their religious life will to! Regards the woman should not cost a lot in Arabic a big and! Taking necessary measures fears Allah consideration, they should be suitable to one another this?... Social status but not to religiousness may cause disturbance and mischief Social Security when. Be able to handle can i marry a girl 2 years older than me woman can marry a man younger or older by 2 younger/older... Protect holy Kabbah from pigeon poo an example in our Prophet ( pbuh ) married Khadijah... Difference, it would n't matter if you are ready to bear the consequences oldest this person should date OK... This hadith says, `` he 's too young for marriage no requirements for age in marriage one of woman. There 's nothing wrong with marrying a guy a year or two the. With an older man, can i marry a girl 2 years older than me I say older I mean ten to twenty years is basically difference... Important aspect of religiousness into consideration by muslims.... Largest age gap, two... To do w/ paranoid Shias who think all Jews have no choice to... Ve learnt a thing or two about the benefits of dating younger women, celebrate., 15, 20 and maybe 30 years old than an 80 year old girl and a half.! Throughout my thirties an example in our life which would likely put strain! An arranged marriage, your ideal match is picked for you in harmony for with! Strain on any possible relationship than him ) could you please explain hadith. Holy Kabbah from pigeon poo want to get permission frm parents women, and to.

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